I just got a box in the mail from my mom. It’s not what you’re thinking.
Mostly, it’s a bunch of old, somewhat broken, somewhat inscrutable Christmas tree ornaments. Or decorations, maybe? It’s hard to tell.
Why is my mom sending me old ornaments? I suspect it’s because I told her my two-year-old knocked down the Christmas tree over the weekend and broke everything.
So she’s replenishing our ornament supply with festive vaginas.
Anyway, beneath all the ornaments, I happened upon this…
Side note: Yes, this is a pen name. But McLeod is my mom’s maiden name, so I have some claim to it.
What’s in the envelope, you ask?
It’s a printed Wikipedia article about Mary Anne MacLeod Trump… Donald Trump’s mother.
Who was a MacLeod.
If anyone needs me, I’ll be sobbing in the corner.
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